A Twist on My Type A Tendencies

Lately, I’ve been making a lot of changes to my mindset, re-evaluating my approach to life. I’ve always been a “Type A” person. I love knowing how I’m going to get from point A to point B. I love looking ahead and making sure I’m always moving forward. I find value in having a plan and knowing exactly which steps are going to lead me to my next goal, whether it’s in my career, my relationships, or my health/fitness lifestyle. Structure and strategy have been my best friends ever since I can remember (and sometimes, they still are)! In some ways, having a step by step guide to how I’m going to attain my goals is extremely helpful and comforting. Let’s be honest, who doesn’t get immense levels of satisfaction out of crossing things off of your to-do list one by one?? I know I can’t be the only one. Planning ahead is something that has helped me to be as successful as I have been thus far.

However, I’ve reached a point where I recognize that some of my “Type A-ness” has become unhelpful. As a military spouse, change and uncertainty are part of the gig. I experience change very consistently in my life. My husband is here, and then sometimes he’s not. He’s home for a week then gone for three, or home for a month and then away for the next four. In the past four years, I have lived in 5, soon to be 6, different places spanning New York to California. I have completed my master’s degree, held several different jobs and internships, jumped from coast to coast, planned a wedding from the other side of the country, gotten married and experienced our first deployments. To say that I’ve faced a lot of big changes throughout the past few years, feels like an astronomical understatement.

For my fellow Type A people, I’m sure you can imagine how all of this change and uncertainty affected my stress levels. I found myself feeling anxious and discouraged because I couldn’t always piece together what the next few weeks, months, or years of my life would look like.

Throughout the past few weeks, I feel like I’ve been bombarded by a different idea, a more relaxed approach to life. The more I learn about it, the more I listen to other people’s experiences and opinions, the more I feel attracted to the idea of loosening up the reigns on my Type A tendencies.

To get an idea of where my head is at, I scrolled back to my most recent saved posts and screen shots that I keep on my phone to inspire me on a daily basis.

Here are the most recent quotes I’ve saved:

  • “You don’t have to have it all figured out to move forward.”
  • “To begin, begin.”
  • “You don’t have to get it perfect, you just have to get going.”
  • “May the space between where I am and where I want to be inspire me.”
  • “If you can’t figure out your purpose, figure out your passion. For your passion will lead you right into your purpose.” – T.D. Jakes

As I’ve begun my journey as an entrepreneur and a coach, so many things have started to open up for me. I find myself feeling FREED by the thought of always having the space and ability to mold my lifestyle to be exactly what feels best for me, while doing work that I am incredibly passionate about. I now have a day to day that keeps me feeling motivated, inspired and fulfilled. I have put myself out there more than ever before. I’ve found myself consistently stepping out of my comfort zone and trying new things which has led to meeting incredible new people, learning new skill sets and pushing my limits.

So, I may not necessarily know exactly where I’ll be five years from now, one year from now or heck, even 3 months from now. I may not have a step by step process of how I’m going to reach my goals. One thing I do have is the power of presence. I know exactly where I want to go, who I want to be, and the kind of life I want to live. Not knowing how I’ll get there this time around feels less scary and more exciting! I wake up each day doing work that I love. I have the privilege of helping others. I am consistently working towards bettering myself and expanding my knowledge base so I can better serve my community. I have found that being present and finding joy in the little unplanned steps has helped me to make progress faster, while leaving the stress and anxiety behind.

I can choose to trust that I am exactly where I need to be, knowing that I will get exactly where I want to go. This mindset and approach is simply enough for me right now, and that feels good. I invite you to join me in this mindset, presence and trust. Try it out and let me know what happens!!

Picture of Chelsea Connors

Chelsea Connors